34b Cup Does Manhattan

It's not that I didn't want to tell you, but I just found out myself. Before you get all panicked you should know this doesn't change things between us. I'm still going to give you a daily dose from the 34b cup (is that weird?). The only difference is it may be updated at Eastern Standard Time. I have been granted a great privilege from the interior design fairies (am I good at this "pun-thing" or what?). Ya see GF is opening a satellite office in NYC and yours truly is the liaison for all projects a la Manhattan. Is that cool or what? So while we may have to reschedule a happy hour here or there you will be supplied with blogging tidbits straight from the big pomme de terre. I'll be combing the island for celebrity sightings, fun little nooks and crannies and the trials and tribulations of using public transportation (oh ya and working too I guess). By the time you read this Monday entry I will already be hookin' for a project for one of those "Real Housewives of New York City." No, no the casa 34b will not be relocated from the Mississippi to the Hudson. I, my homeys, will just work on becoming "silver elite" status with the our local airlines. So for the next few days I have, my friends, insured you will be well cared for. I have hired the best bloggey-sitter there is. Our favorite author of "Hank's Dream" and "Nicki's Dream" will get the blog du jour to you until I get the NYC computer up and running (tech support already on speed dial). Ok, this is gonna be fun and exciting not to mention a GREAT experience-so check your bag at the gate and come back tomorrow for breaking news.

Poll Results!!! AND WARNING!!!

YAY! I win! Keep your eyes peeled for me in this little yellow slug bug coming soon to freeways near you...

Come on and drive! 5 votes or 100%
(everyone follows directions beautifully)

Now I KNOW you are a crazed woman 0 votes 0%
(now I know my hubby doesn't read the blog b/c he for sure would have voted nay)

OK AND ON A SERIOUS NOTE!!! SOMEONE BY THE BLOGGER NAME KIJAR POSTED ON MY BLOG TODAY WITH AN ATTACHMENT. AFTER SOME RESEARCH I FOUND OUT THIS ATTACHMENT IS A VIRUS. IF YOU EVER GET A COMMENT FROM KIJAR OR SEE THIS COMMENT IN ANOTHER BLOGS COMMENT DO NOT CLICK ON THIS LINK!!! WHAT A JERK-NO-ONE MESSES WITH THE B CUPS!

The heel, the whole heel and nothing but the heel...

I have an unwelcomed little secret I was hoping would just go away just as it arrived. Unfortunately, it just seems to be hanging on like a bad VD (thank goodness it's not-scouts honor). I just kept thinking if I stopped thinking about it-well then-it would just stop hurting. I mean I AM THIRTY-NOT ONE-HUNDRED AND TWO! Like the total hard-headed-german-V-Scoy I am (shut up Jerrid) I just kept on it pushing myself at the club and continued hitting the trail until the ouch crawled right up to my ankle and then yes into the dreaded knee. Then I finally called out "Uncle" and went to see my nice Dr. James at the finest orthopedic joint this side of the tracks. All those smarty pants Doctors and Nurses treat the great professional athletes we covet so in them I trust as well. Last week old Dr. James wrapped the tootsie up just like Magic Johnson shoulda wrapped his junk up in the nineties. Dr. James said, "if this works we'll fit you for a perfectly crafted pair of orthodics" and you be back to the brut you are at no time (well, to paraphrase I guess)." "Come back and see me in one week!" I really tried and willed myself to feel better with the foot wrapped better than a Martha Stewart gift, but it just wasn't happening. So today I hung my head in defeat and went back to see what Dr. James recommended next. Ohhh boy! What he recommended (and did) was a needle big enough scare Hannibal Lecter stuffed full of cortisone. My adrenaline was running so high I coulda bench pressed a small car. Did it hurt? Oh for sure-and I knew it was going to be bad when right before the needle pierced the inner depths of my calloused heel he inquired, "have you had kids?" OMG! Dude (James, Jim, Jimbo, whatever) don't say stuff like that when you are 12 inches from my foot mule kicking you right in the chops. But I made it-with only a wince. AND the best part? Dr. James (who by the way is a man) said that when he gives that shot to men he always asks they lay down because more often than not they fold like a lawn chair. Ha! Just goes to show us ladies are tough as nails. So anywho let the body dysmorphia begin because I swear I am up 5lbs just from hearing him say, "two weeks of taking it easy-no poundin' on that heel of yours."

Now listen, I hate to have to tell you this, but... tomorrow I'm hitch hiking my way to "uff-dah" land for a couple of days. Wipe that tear from your eye-you're gonna be just fine. I'll check back in with you on Monday with an update. In the meantime don't forget some of my preferred reading-the links are listed to the right. T.T.F.N.

The Brown Bear Weighs In...

I'm not saying man's/woman's best friend isn't worth their weight in gold, just saying my 80 pounder (she is up 6lbs just like the rest of us this time of year-oopppps) is worth more than that... both literally and figuratively. Wow, has modern veterinary medicine come along way since the farm days when dogs just got a little "shot" of whatever the other barn yard animals got. About this time each year we head on over for the annual round of vaccinations and a little check up by Dr. Rich to keep the brown bear healthy. We happily hand over our weary check card to the tune of $350.00 and know that we are getting off easy. Miss Kato has been one spendy companion (note to self check into pet insurance). I mean who even knew that a dog could tear an acl requiring surgery and 4 weeks of hydro-therapy (yes walking on a treadmill submerged in a tank of warm water) at the U of M. I have no idea what she got herself into that causes her to break out in a major case of the hives resulting in an emergency room trip for some sort of steroid shot. Of course their was the time the experts think she suffered from speenic torsion (don't even ask) which meant an early morning visit not only to the regular vet but also a day's stay at the emergency room. It was completely freaked out the time she got stung right in the eye by a bee and her eye socket swelled to look like she was holding a golf ball behind her lid (no wonder her face is getting all grey). Then this winter the "big accident" when she was impaled by a mostly snow submerged steel fence post. Resulting in about 35 stitches, a drain tube, 3 medications, a narcotic pain patch and 10 hours in the emergency room, five follow up visits and a lonely Christmas holiday filled with me in a mild depressive state (another mental note-should have asked for a narcotic patch for me too). Throw in a ex-ray to find out she had not swallowed a tennis ball rather just had major gas, a stick puncture through the kinda-webbed-part of her toe, a case of kennel cough, a few ear infections, and a couple of bladder infections for good measure and we coulda had ourselves a BMW 5 series. Ah well, who needs a flashy car anywayz. But tell me where else you can find a running partner who NEVER bugs out of a workout. I would do it all over for a furry friend who wags her hearty tail when she sees you open your eyes in the morning. I mean it is all worth it to get a good laugh of outta her "de-fuzzing" a new tennis ball (she just has this thing for the nap). You'll likely only find this amusing if you are a dog lover too...

Oh Miss Kato we love ya!

Miss Kato vs Brandy

Just like many other folks we traveled over the river and through the woods to spend the Easter holiday with some family. The hubby grew up in a sleepy little town with only the necessities of "city" livin'. You know two gas stations (gas and sunflower seeds-"spitters" as my dad calls em), a grocery store (better check the date on the beef patties), bakery (nothing like an old school long john), two cafes (filled to the brim mid afternoon for coffee), a beauty salon (offering $12 cuts-tempting, huh?) and a VFW (well, of course country folk gotta party too). I love the little hobby farm my MOM and DAD in-law live on-it is so cute! They reside with two great quarter horses, Brandy and Schmitty, two barn cats Elvis and Asia, and one nuisance raccoon. You gotta check out this barn yard video of Kato, the city dog, trying to stir a little something up with a 14&1/2 hand high horsey. I'm not sure who she spooked more... Anyway, thank you Easter Bunny for the self induced chocolate bloat I am sporting today and for the crunchy greenbacks!

PS Just to rub it in I had a fabulous three day weekend since I didn't have to work on Friday. Obviously I spend the entire day at mass (ehhh-em-no, its nothing just something stuck in my throat). Alright all my animal loving bloggers check in tomorrow for an update on Miss Kato's annual physical.

FASHION FRIDAY! If it's yellow let it mellow...

I know...sick, but what a great little tidbit of slang that I hope no one is living by. Enough with the tangent, huh, pay attention to the task at hand: Fashion Friday. Today we talk about THE ONLY color for the spring and my reigning favorite; (aside from my old faithful pink) screaming yellow. If your not havin' any of this sunshine infused hue than you are gonna be in trouble. But I'm buyin' whatever they are sellin' baby cuz it's H-O-T! Take for example this vintage beetle circa 1974. I want it and I am not above a full blown kicking and screaming tantrum until I get one! I mean seriously-why is my hubby not complying with my dream of sporting this summer car!?! I would be so cute with bright red lips and huge tortoise shell glasses screaming down the freeway in this thang (sooo Romee and Michelle). I think I should try and prove my point with a little poll (don't even bother responding unless you are gonna answer correctly). I suppose you would like some other yellow options for summer that won't require an additional insurance policy or a 4th garage stall, huh? Add a little "hitch in your giddy up" by adding a burst of the canary color into your ho-hum closet full of brown, black and grey. I love it here, oh and there, yes that is the spot, I like it, I LOVE it, yes, YES, Y-E-S!!! (sooo totally When Harry Met Sally). Well my blogging Easter bunnies hop back around on Monday for

for a look at what was in my basket.

PS Happy Spring!!!

Surfing and Bathing Forbidden!

I'm hoping you didn't forget your passport because today our little international rendezvous continues. Munchen, (Munich for all the Americans who need to mess with tradition) Germany is a fabulous place to visit. Let me start by telling you how hard it was to get here. We arrived in Chicago just in time to see our connecting flight to Germany pull away from the terminal! As you guessed I immediately started with the lip quiver as my husband tried to negotiate our seats on another flight (and pleaded with me to turn off the tears) so of course I fell into a full out break down. All you really need to know from that point forth is that we...

A: rented an overpriced hotel room instead of the kind offer to sleep on a cot guarded by the Chi-town police.
B: we were not able to retrieve our luggage so by the time we arrived in Munich I had officially been wearing the SAME underwear for over 32 hours.
C: my husband shirt was so stretched out it could have doubled as an old woman's nightie-AND-he had practically grown a full beard.
D: all of the above are reasons I look like this after one "rattler" (1/2 lemonade and 1/2 German beer) at the famous Hofbrau Hous.
E: just for the hell of it we were drinking our jet lag away listening to this!

Sooo, anyway who cares we made it and had a great time. We took a fab drinking/biking (mostly drinking) tour with a crazy group of folks from all over the place (this tour is so cool it was my second time-the first was with my friend Krissy in the ole MSU days). So funny to see the transformation that happens when a bunch of strangers (all individually normal) people get together spend an entire afternoon on cruisers together. Just think of men acting like boys on bikes-racing, rubbing tires, popping wheelies, blood, sweat and this time no tears. Click here to see a group photo our Mike's Bike Tour Clan (I got to meet the "mike" and he's a cutie too). A seriously fun troop, minus the girl in the green tank top, who bounced her C cups around like no one's business. By now you are thinking, geeezhuz, get to the friggin' point... which is it was so cool watching these dare devils blatantly ignore the warning sign and surf in the English Channel! Check it out!

One last thing everyone should be aware of when traveling to Deutschland. Cable TV has "soft-core" on every other channel if you know what I mean. Guys won't want to leave the hotel room. If you aren't catching my drift you have bigger problems... See ya for Fashion Friday!

S-C-H-A-D-E-N-F-R-E-U-D-E

Bueller... Bueller... I know I promised ya'll a little lesson in German and I know you thought it was a typo because of my fluidity in Francais (the kind if French you don't speak in front of your Grandma). So just as I promised we tackle the proper usage of my favorite German word. Don't panic no deep, guttural inflections necessary here. Just let it roll of your tongue... schadenfreude. If you need a little help with the pronunciation crank up your volume-your cube mate won't mind.

Definition:
malicious-joy; malicious glee; gloating; Schadenfreude f; Häme fSchadenfreude

Just admit it you all know exactly what I am talking about. Laughing at some poor fool who slips on the ice and takes a header. Getting a good chuckle out of a male type receiving accidental and unwanted contact to "jim and the twins". Whatever you get the idea and you and I both know you think it's funny.

So I learned my favorite German word from my favorite Broadway show Avenue Q. If you ever are in NYC and have time to take in a show this is the one you need to, have to, absolutely must go see! It is so bad it's GOOD! Not a single race, gender or sexual preference (hoping by now you are just pickin' up what I'm droppin'-cuz not sure if that makes sense) is safe. This show is no doubt an equal opportunity offender! A little side note to all parents: you have messed up your offspring enough already-these Sesame Street look alikes are NOT rated G. We are talking about topics from a pretty hot puppet scene "in the sack" to discussions of the "Burt" look alike puppet coming out of the closet. I know! Better than an entire afternoon of soaps-fur sure. The rest of the week I will keep the old Ipod link of my blog loaded with Avenue Q songs pirated from the dubya, dubya, dubya.

Zurückkommen morgen klugscheißer-hose (return tomorrow smarty pants) die brandung ist bis deutscher stil jungeeee (cuz the surfs up German style boyeeee)(check my work here if you don't trust me).

34b Guided Tour of Powell Court

Gather round all my international blogging travelers for a tour of Powell Court.


A prologue before we get started...

As if you don't know me by now, BUT just in case beware... I am a crier. There I said it! And just the thought of Miss Kato leaving this mortal earth for the big dog bones in the sky makes my heart heavy. Probably have MOM to thank for the instant lip quivering thing-cases in point... Remember when I hatched baby duckies for my 4th Grade science project? Once they were too big and pooped too much to call a cardboard box in our kitchen home we had to set them free... Dad banded their legs and told me we could keep track of them that way and MOM cried the whole way to Wylie Park pond AND home. We tend to be a little sentimental ya know? The grass in my parent's backyard grows green and fertile... R.I.P. Gretchen (dog), Pookie I and II (hamsters), Za Zoo I, II, III (parakeets) and Corkey I-? (birdies too).

The Powell Court pet cemetery drew me in like my Grandma and a K-Mart blue light special. Tucked in the most perfect and peaceful part of the garden each and every beloved pet has a place to rest and a heartfelt monument for remembrance. Click here for Bully, the pony. Here for Kilfang the wolf hound. This is the spot for Doodles and Sun Yat Sen the chows. And here to see my hubby in the background wishing I would hurry the you-know-what up. Gheeez!

The rest of Powell Court ain't so shabby either. I found it intoxicating (fine maybe the pint of ale we had with lunch helped too) with the lush green grass and the perfect gardens. Even I could capture this somewhat artistic shot with the ole Sony Cybershot. I mean is this Green #8 and Granny Smith Apple #40 right from the Crayola box or what? I am so lucky!

Be sure you are present tomorrow for role call as we are gonna have a lesson in German 34b cup style.

Full Moon Over Ireland

Happy St. Patty's Day my Irish or Irish wannabe bloggers! In honor of this clover leaf day go ahead and indulge in a pint Guinness (or if you must just add a little green food coloring to your Miller Lite-crazy yankees). My hubby and have been fortunate enough to do a little traveling together and last year we spent a little in time in Ireland. I thought in observance of the day I would give you a little tour of our travels. You see we started in our excursion in Wickow where we had to act like totally tacky tourists and take this photo at some really important monument. Is it any wonder we Americans get a bad wrap? One the way back to our bed and breakfast via the Wickow Mountains (where Braveheart was filmed) we passed signs like this and I heard my hubby recite (siiiighhhhh, again) his favorite line "William Wallus... with fireballs from his eyes and bolts of lighting from his arse". I know you are wondering how we managed to drive all over the countryside on the wrong side of the road and the wrong side in the car!?! Let me just say when Jerrid turned into oncoming traffic I hauled off and smacked him in the head with the map (I wish I were kidding-look at his glasses)! In all seriousness the scenery is like no other AND the Irish really are a cool group of lads and lad-ettes (I just make it up as I go) with a lot of love for their history. Only in Ireland do you visit the Dublin Castle (state the obvious why don't I) and learn where the word "plastered" (you know, bomb'd, wasted, housed) came from. Our guide said the pot-o-gold was getting a little low during construction and they couldn't afford the fancy stone for some of the towers... so what do the Irish do? They add a little stout beer to the wall plaster in order to get that darker finished look-hence the term "to get plastered" (I have no clue what you would do without me)! There you have it-just enough to keep ya coming back for more.

Speaking of more-saunter back again tomorrow one of my fav stops in Ireland: Powell Court (including the pet cemetery)(Powell Court Waterfall shown here).

I leave you my friend on this St. Patrick's Day with one final Braveheart (again) thought: "The lord tells me he can get me out of this mess, but he's pretty sure your f'd!"

Fashion Friday: What the? Who the? How the? Why the?

A series of Fashion Friday questions which suddenly POP into my mind when I see a mankini! What the heck is ensuring the "twig and berries" don't squirt out the sides of this uni-tard-looking-get-up? Who in the Sam Hell thinks they look good in this thing (this includes all you singlet wearing wrastlers out there)? How on earth do non-Borat's get the ka-hu-nas (heee, heee, ha!) to put one of these on AND THEN POSE FOR A BLACKMAIL QUALITY PHOTOGRAPH? And then I have to take a step back and ask myself why in the h.e.double hockey sticks am I curious what this looks like from the back view? Sick and wrong? Oh for sure! Honest? Always!


P.S. One final demented thought... I only know one brave sole who would bare almost everything and sport the mankini (he is known for some blue ribbon Halloween costumes). And folks here he is (this picture is a whole 'nother blog entry).

See ya back here-same time, same place on Monday so I can wish you a Happy St. Patty's Day and we will start a new poll. Have a rockin' weekend ya hear?

So stop me if you've read this one...

Nothing like a great forward to really get your day started off the right way. This one was specially delivered to my inbox by my friend Kari. This my friends is the true value of a Roncalli High School Catholic education and a #2 pencil.

Little Nicki was not the best student in Catholic School . Usually she slept through the class. One day her teacher, a Nun, called on her while she was sleeping. "Tell me Nicki, who created the universe?" When Nicki didn't stir, little Johnny who was her friend sitting behind her, took his pencil and jabbed her in the rear. "God Almighty!" shouted Nicki. The Nun said, "Very good" and continued teaching her class. A little later the Nun asked Nicki, "Who is our Lord and Savior?" But Nicki didn't stir from her slumber. Once again, Johnny came to her rescue and stuck Nicki in the butt. "Jesus Christ!!!" shouted Nicki and the Nun once again said, "Very good," and Nicki fell back to sleep. The Nun asked her a third question..."What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?" Again, Johnny came to the rescue. This time Nicki jumped up and shouted, "If you stick that damn thing in me one more time, I'll break it in half!" The nun fainted...........


By now you all know the drill. On que for tomorrow Fashion Friday-AND-I think you're gonna like it!

$65.00 + Tip

Holy Haircut! Jerrid gets the BEST and probably most expensive boy haircuts E-V-E-R! I would like to think I have shown him the light and guided him on his journey from the $12.00 uni-haircut (you know what I mean-same cut all guys - #1 on the sides and #2 on the top blended not so well) from Great Clips to the perfectly clipped tresses from Juut Salon. Just how expensive has this evolution been you are perhaps wondering? Jerrid now happily hands over his battered check card to the tune of $65.oo + tip. I know! Here is the deal. He (and I) love Juut. This place is totally hip and everyone there is cute and trendy (not in a freaky kind of facial piercing sort of way-although they have a couple of those too) which is always a good sign. They massage your head to stress relieve before your cut and they use the best Aveda products on this earth to perfectly sculpt your perfectly finished "do". You may think this is all worth the $65.00 + tip, but I haven't told you the mane (get it?) attraction (get it?) to this salon de beaute... Jennifer. Beautiful, sweet, funny Jennnifer. Jerrid LOVES her. She gives him the perfect "not just cut" haircut every time, massages his dark, chocolate colored head-o-hair and maybe just maybe does his ego a little good too (hence the $65.00 + tip). (Jennifer if there is any chance you are reading this you know I love you too-I wouldn't trust another!) I tried to capture this fresh cut of his-but as you see my model was less than cooperative.

P.S. Sorry to disappoint for those of you who were tuning in for the big reveal of what we did last night... We had a little hiccup in our original plans-no worries I will bring you up to speed in the near future. BUT I am a gal of my words so here is what really happens behind the scenes at Casa 34b... Yes that is a Stella Artois AND a bag of pet ownership in my SAME hand (multitasking at its finest). After the walk (50 degrees!) we picked up a lot of this from this culprit! Well you asked...

Ok all my pooper-scooper bloggers come back around tomorrow for a little Catholic humor.

www.photobucket.com - A Fabulous Time Burner!

This is the BOMB my peeps! I am totally hooked-this site is sooo addictive! You will not believe all the fun stuff you can do with your photos. And ya wanna know what else? It is free-I almost can't believe my good fortune!

http://www.photobucket.com/ is like PhotoShop for dummies! This is just a little sampler platter of what you can do with just the click of a mouse. Censor stuff out to protect the innocent (and to avoid challenging your gag reflex) (I have a feeling I will be using this Ah-lot!). Change a photo to black and white, sepia or bronze (like my homegirl and I above).

Pimp your photo to look like a cartoon (how perfect I used Aaron to show this example). Make Andy Warhol proud by creating your own pop art. Add thought bubbles like the one I gave Kato(I truly think this is what she would say if she could talk). Create your own slide show like the one on the right with all the pix from Laurie's birthday party. Or check out my personal fav in the column to the right on my blog. I took a photo of some innocent ladies in the water and completely defaced their photo! AND it is a very blogger friendly site so you can easily grab the html codes to cut and paste the goodies onto your blog, Facebook or MySpace page. To get started create an account, upload your photos and then edit until your heart is content! Give it a whirl and let me know what you think!

Okee-dokee be sure warm up for tomorrow. We're gonna dish on what Jerrid and I did on Tuesday night.

34b Cup Hates Quitters!

If you are picturing me climbing up on that soap box to lecture about dropping out of school, throwing in the workout towel or saying "forget that," to the latest diet fade THINK AGAIN! This is about a whole 'nother kind of quitter and in my opinion, the most annoying.

Prepare my friends to add another very technical term to your vocabulary. The "stocking" quitter is a relentless offender! Let me elaborate. You're at the gym-warming up for the big workout and what the??? Your sock has completely slide off your heel and is now in an annoying bunch under your foot-by definition this sock is a total quitter. You're futzing around the house and the toe of your lazy tube sock has extended 4 inches off the front of your foot-again a quitter. You arrive at the office and you are not there 10 minutes and the crotch of your hosiery has sagged down to your knees-your guessed it-quitters. Now go ahead adopt the terminology and use it as if it were your own.

Well my barefoot bloggers pitter-patter back around tomorrow so I can fill you in on my new favorite way to waste perfectly good time.

MANscaping Poll Is In!

Alright, all you shavers, waxers and pluckers... The results are in!

Sculpt things like a best in show poodle! 8 groomers or 88% (thank goodness)

Let it be like a tree hugger's arm pits! 1 wooly mammoth or 11% (who are you???)

Make sure to get that shave nice and close to increase your odds-afterall it is SATURDAY!

TTFN-see ya Monday!

Ode to Lacquered Leather!

Oh how I love that shiny, lacquer coated leather! The history of patent leather dates back to the 19th century courtesy of Mr. Seth Boyden of Newark, New Jersey-hey thanks guy! I wonder if he had any idea his invention would lead to this modern usage? Ok, anyway, as I was saying every chick needs a little patent in her wardrobe (guys not so sure you can be included on this trend)! Rev up any old outfit with a patent leather trinket of your choice-let me make a couple of suggestions... Add a little dazzle with a patent headband or wrist cuff. Livin' things up with a pair red patent pumps or wide, waist defining belt (come on scare-de-cat try it). Tote all your precious belongings (a.k.a junk) in this hot little Fendi (cha-ching!). Or you can try "spicing" things up on a whole 'nother level with a little outfit like this (paired nicely with your choice of rooms at the Fantasuites-thank me later). I would like to suggest you steer clear of patent leather trousers/britches-these have been known to lead to a terrible case of SWASS (sweaty arse for all you newbees). In summary the next time you are in pursuit of a fun addition to the accessory section of your closet remember the beloved patent leather.

Well my trend setting bloggers see you on Monday for a chat about "quitters" 34b cup style.

Remembering Charlie

Today is reserved for a tribute to a special little dude I wish I had the chance to meet. This peanut sure touched a lot of lives and certainly continues to do so. Charlie Johnston would be 7 years old today and certainly would be teaching his lil' bro Henry all sorts of good stuff. I think he still does-just in a little different way. Happy Birthday little fella!

See ya'll tomorrow for Fashion Friday!

A Tale Told Via Denim

Gather around my fellow tight rollers. Come closer, undo your top button and get comfy cuz today I am going share a story about one girls life stages through her jeans (DON'T get any funny ideas). Yes my friends it hasn't always been flattering, nor properly fit but come along on this adventure via a pair of indigo (sometimes) colored trousers. It likely all began with a pair of these cute and innocent little things. Unfortunately this was a trend that I decided to revisit in my "tween" years (braces and tightly permed hair in-tow) and unfortunately no one stopped me. Of course my closet was once home to Jordache, Levi and Calvin Klein but my true loves were GUESS and Marithe Francois Girbaud; (pronunciation still unknown) at the then whopping cost of $50.00 a pair. WHAT was my MOM thinking? In those days a pair of tapered leg, carpenter style, Girbauds in red or yellow with a tight rolled bottom hem were so sweet (complete the look with a pair of Eastland loafers void of socks-P.U.). I mean come on... what girl's silhouette doesn't benefit from wearing a high waisted, wide thigh pair of jeans finished off with the ever flattering tight-roll, peg-leg or pinned detail (get yourself a patch work silk or flannel shirt and you are really lookin' money)? Seriously-I am gagging! Too hot for jeans in the summer? Never! Just cut those babies off to desired finish length and wash 2x to get the perfect fray. I also wore em like this, and this (uff-dah) and this, my MOM and DAD did this, and I am hopeful I haven't ever done this. Is this a life lesson in what not to wear or what?

So kids, hopefully lessons have been learned in one short blog. Now do you part to spur the economy. Head on out to the local Nieman's and splurge on a pair of Sevens or Citizens of Humanity. Tell your husband/wife you are totally worth it (then dare them to debate it).

Bring your tight, little tuushy back tomorrow for a tribute.

P.S. Happy Birthday wishes to my MOMa bear! Can't wait til you "master" solitaire on your new laptop and get brave enough to "do the Internet." Love you MOM!

As Promised... A MOM Joke

Oh this is just bad. My MOM loves bad jokes (some worse than others). Here is my first attempt at trying to relay her humor over the blog.

The setting: Lazy Aber-daber SoDak.

The time: Coffee break (Starlite Cafe-if you really need details).

Two old men are having mid morning coffee. One man says to the other, "Did you know Lions screw up to 10 times a day?" The other old man looks at him with disappointment and says, "you have got to be sh*#@ting me-I just joined the Elks!"

Ba-dum-bum-CHING!

Tomorrow a tale of denim-the good, the bad and the acid washed.

34b Cup Tested, Godmother Approved

So when I started this little ole blog of mine I never really considered anyone would read it (except for Nicki-cuz she taught me all I know about blogs and my hubby-because I threatened him). Little did I know my MOM would be pedaling the blog just like she does those St. Mary's Bizarre tickets-seriously this woman is relentless! So when she passed on the word about this "blog-thing," as she kindly to refers to it as, to my God Mother here is what happened...

This was the email I received from my God Mother, Ginger. (Of course I have to narrate in italics. I hope it translates well.)

Sent: Thursday, February 28, 2008 1:15 PM

Oh my, Just visited your blogspot and what a long way we have come from the day I held you in my arms in your baptismal gown and promised your Grandma Anderson that you would have a Christian upbringing to becoming aware that you now have a stripper name. (oh shame-even though we both know my German Grandma would proud as kuchen (get it proud as pie, proud as kuchen?)) Ha! Mine would be Louie Arch. Doesn't work. But neither does this body. (I'm thinking maybe she should give it a try..."Louie Arch your back around that pole!" Besides she is one smoking hot God Mama!) I'm loving your blog. Hey, could Nate A be Aman? He was a cutie. (OMGosh! I CAN NOT BELIEVE she guessed it! AND if anyone forwards this blog to him I will hurt you!) And that is the best REO Speedwagon song. (Again she is so cool!) Keep blogging. I'll be watching. (mental note made) You are such a special lady. (She is the BEST!) Love you lots, Ginger (Right back atcha-I love you too!)

Ok, so seriously... Now is the part where I get kinda sappy (if you are a cryer get Kleenex now).

I am so lucky! I have the greatest, kindest, most supportive, and fun family! This is the stuff that really matters in life-ya know? These people have all made me the person that I am today (I got all the naughty stuff from my two cousins Kimberli and Roni) like it or not. Ginger and Dick my God parents are two of the coolest cats you will ever meet-been friends with my folks since their days as Golden Eagles. It just doesn't get any better than that! Thanks again Ginger for EVERYTHING you have done for me-I love you!

Fine then... sinner and saint bloggers alike. See you tomorrow for my first MOM joke.

Poll Results In!

Here is who 34b cup bloggers are sending to Le Blanc Maison! Rock on Barack!

Obama Fo Yo Mama 11 votes or 61%
Hilary is My Home Girl 4 votes or 22%
Mad Man McCain 3 votes or 16%