The Vlog.

Just when you feel like you have the cyber world by the go-nads you see yet another technical advancement in the world of blogging. Say hello to the vlog. Kinda like a blog post only completely animated and way over my head. My personal vlog fav? The Blah, Blah, Blah girls. Who post a new vlog every Monday, have a hilarious site, sell Blah T-shirts, post celebrity smut AND manage to have an endorsement from Vitamin Water. Totally hate-able if they weren't so damn funny. Speaking of funny-tomorrow I'll give you the 411 on some MUST see sitcoms since it's to freakin' cold to do anything else.

Happy Birthday Catfish!

Dude, duuuuude, d-uuuuuu-da! It's time for a shout out to an oldie, but a goodie! Catfish, Catfish, Catfish... If you hadn't asked me to, "play nice," I woulda had no problem telling the world you are 27 years away from collecting your first, "ss," check. Opps, well anyway what's the big deal-e-o bout almost being fffff... forrr.... forttt... Oh, almostfortyget it already. How's that go? You are only as old as you act (feel, whatever). In your case I'd say your older than 2, but not a day over 21. If the porch was open, I'd crank Buffet on the Ipod & send ya off with a birthday jig-you handsome devil you! This Bud's for you! Happy Birthday to one of my most favorite people in the whole wide world!

Resolve.

Happy Fashion Friday. I know, I know. Today I am supposed to produce some useless fashion info that you likely never ahere to. But, I'm busy. Busy working on New Year's resolutions. I thought I better get them in writing before I cast them off as lost causes. NYE this year was a little different than years past for a few reasons. A. I stayed awake waaaay past midnight. B. I tried a on a couple of Mexican traditions for size. C. Instead of trudging through the snow I shuffled through the sand. MOM and I rang in the New Year in prime time style this year. On the beach for a fiesta fit for the 2 queens we are. Lucky for us the cute, little (& when I say little I mean it) Mexican waiter had a little, "thing," for me. N-E-V-E-R in all of Mexican history has a table received better service under the, "open bar," philosophy. You can tell by the gloss in my eyes we took full advantage (of the open bar, NOT the waiters advances). We dined on lobster bisque, shrimp the size of my palms and pina coladas after pina coladas after, well you get the picture. So back to the new traditions. Each guest writes a wish for 2009 and attaches it to a balloon. At the stroke of midnight the entire clan releases the balloons over the ocean in attempt to make the wish come true and pollute our natural resources. I of course, wished for Health, Happiness and all 6 Power Ball Numbers. Then this happened. Fireworks, waves crashing in. The steamy, salty air flushing our dewy cheeks. Soooo romantic - if you weren't there with your MOM.

What NYE fiesta wouldn't be complete with a mantra of American tunes blasting across the bay for a beach side dance party? Now, I had consumed my fair share of, "toddies," but I was no where near catching up with this drunk dancer...

We laughed, we drank, we shared a truly great mother-daughter memory. And then we got the hell outta there as soon as MOM spotted her Mexican stalker (Sebastian) for fear he would make her dance. "Leen-da," as he so lovinly refered to her, has never left a party so fast in her life.

Ok, so real resolutions... Drink more water, eat better and overcome all challenges with a positive attitude AND all 6 Power Ball numbers (someone has to win). Happy Friday!

MOM caught on tape.

Ohhhh, Mama Mia... What did we do before we could capture bathing suit videos on our digital cameras?!? BTW, it's nine degrees here. Nine, 9, niiiiinnnnnneeee! Remind me why we live here instead of some tropical paradise?

Tomorrow, we talk resolutions. No more putting it off, 2009 is here and now. Get off your hump and make, "it," happen.

El Centro-not so nice-o.

Well, you might think we spent all day everyday drinking coconut juice, soaking up the Vitamin D and listening to the waves crash in. But, as I hinted yesterday our trip to el centro wasn't hiccup (or should I say gag) free. So let me set the stage. It's HOT. Freakin' HOT. We're treking through the mangled, little, sea side town in search of the perfect chili relleno. Mario, the leather amigo, sent us on a wild goose chase down the board walk, over the foot bridge, into the ghetto of all ghettos only to find the sketchy "restaurant," closed. MOM wasn't the typical happy camper on the blistering walk back. I led the way guiding her around the trip, stumble and fall hazards that plague this little Mexican village. And wouldn't ya know it. I, the fearless leader, the guide, got caught up in some gawking... And just that quick I was caught under the Policia's sniper fire. Not really. The real truth is I was snooping in an open door and when I turned my head to march on... I marched my forehead right into a metal awning. Talk about adding injury to insult or however the hell it goes! This was it. The adventure into the city was over as far as MOM was concerned. But being the tough broads we are we gave er one more try at Fontnac Susies for our sought after rellenos. You'll be surprised to hear this establishment offered a ceiling fan on low and no a/c. I ordered dos rellenos via sign language and half assed Spanish. The plates came and I posed for a photo, documenting our journey, goose-egg and all. And then did the unthinkable. One bite, the first bite, produced a guttural gag so loud I can still hear it. MOM didn't think we should have to pay for food that tastes like a, "soggy paper towel." I suggested she consider whether she wanted to try and explain that to a woman who doesn't speak one i-oda of the English language. She thought it best to just pay and leave when I told her, "if you think its hot in here, wait till you get to the Mexican jail!" We hailed the nearest cab and went back to the beach to, "drink," our dinner. Never fear the next day we rallied... the split forehead and near vomit attach wasn't all in vain. We made the trek back past the family selling freshly caught oysters on the half shell. I made a friend at the fish market who insisted I pose, "kissing," this ugly Mahi Mahi. And an amiga whom I purchased a handcrafted necklace from insisted I email her a copy of this photo. We left el centro just after an entire city power outage that scared the begeezuz outta us.

Tomorrow a MOM beach video-hilarious.

Hola chicos y chicas!

I'm back, we're back. I traveled 4.5 hours each direction with my jittery-air-travelin-mom, praise be for in-flight cocktails (5 US dollars). We checked in to a great little hotel, right smack center, on playa la ropa, the best beach in the area. Before you could say, "dos cervezas por favor," MOM had a margarita (foreign ice and water won't scare her) in hand (33 pecos). While basking day after day in 87 degrees of tropical bliss we still needed to establish some sort of a schedule (two bossy type A's what do you expect?). Each morning at 6am we woke just long enough to mark our daily territory (lounge chairs) with blue and white striped towels. We exchange a few words on our differing preferences for the A/C setting and catch at least another hour (if not two) of pre beach sleep. At 9am sharp every morning we invest 60 minutes to get a full bod massago-la from the Marias' (250 pecos). Every massage MUST be washed down with an icy cold Corona and a wedge of fresh lime (24 pecos) and some guacamole and sea salted tortilla chips (30 pecos). A little splish-splash (cold?! nah, warm!!!)in the Pacific and MOM is ready to do some beach side bartering with one of the silver dealers (25 US dollars). I take the more frugal approach and purchase two of these woven Mexican specialties ($3 US dollars). After our sun kissed cheeks are rosey red and our shoulders golden brown we hail a Mexican hell ride into the el centro of Zihuantanejo (30 pecos). We walk (and walk) in the sweltering town square in search of the perfect chili relleno. I run into a metal awning and take a chunk outta my forehead and MOM audibly gags on some nasty Mexican fare (priceless). Detalles mañana. (Details tomorrow.) Adios.

I'll tell you one thing...

...while we may be drinking beer and sipping fruity drinks with umbrellas don't expect us to fall for this trick. Well, on second thought don't expect to see me, but you never can be too certain about MOM. I'll bring you home a baggy of sand and a 3 for $9.99 t-shirt.

PS Happy New Year. Can't wait to talk resolutions with you. Were do we even begin?!?